Tennis and I had been friends for a very long time. We grew up together. But we had a falling out about 7 years ago and we hadn't talked to each other since. On Sunday, I took the plunge and dug out my huge bag of racquets and stopped at Target and bought 5 cans of Penns. I went to a local public tennis center and was told that I could hit on the wall for free or rent a court for an hour for $2.50. Now, you'd think that these were crappy courts but they are really really nice courts...they're just really really inexpensive. I KNEW there was a reason I came to Tucson (besides my family and left turns). Two dudes were hitting on the wall so I shelled out the $2.50 and figured I practice my serve or something. By the time I turned the corner, the two dudes were gone so I just went straight to the wall (and claimed it). I hit for about an hour and realized that I still have it a little. I quickly remembered how to hit against a wall -- you don't hit very hard because it comes right back at you that way. You have to be sort of moderate if you want to keep it going and your strokes are very important because you need to be rather precise in how to hit it. I, surprisingly, did pretty well. At one point a ball came right at me and I lifted my leg up and hit the ball under my leg. Yes...I still have that ridiculous trick shot in my repertoire. An old guy was passing by and he said "practicing the under the leg shot, I see" and I said "that ALWAYS needs a lot of practice if you want it to look spontaneous."
Its funny to me that I have friends who have never seen me play tennis because at one point in my life that was about all I did. It was the center of my universe and my day would be totally ruined if I didn't play well or if something bad happened on the court. I really don't remember much about any of the classes I took at West Point but I remember a lot about the time I spent on the tennis court because that was what was most important to me at that time. In a moment of introspection last year, I asked a former West Point boyfriend what I was like back then. He said "you played a lot of tennis...a lot of tennis." Oh yeah. I did. Its actually a miracle that I even had enough time for a boyfriend back then (he probably thought that I didn't have enough time...now that I think about it).
Ironically, the first time I had any type of tennis lesson was at these very same Tucson public tennis courts. I remember it clearly, they asked me to bounce a ball using a racquet and I had trouble holding the racquet. I don't remember how old I was -- probably about 8 or so. The instructor told my mother that I didn't have enough wrist strength to play tennis and to come back in a year or so when my arm got stronger. [I also failed to get a red cross swimming badge at this same park....of course I ended up being a very good swimmer despite that fact.] So...my tennis career was over before it started.
When we moved to Bangkok, Thailand, I used to accompany my mother to the tennis courts and I'd pick up a few baht here and there by hiring myself out as a ballgirl with the Thai kids. The pro at this club was named Sampow and he was the male tennis champion of Thailand at the time. My mother arranged for me to take tennis lessons with Sampow and he used to drill me by having me hit a tennis ball in a sock that he would hold just out of reach. [So I'd learn to hit the ball in front of me.] I remember him clearly saying in broken english "Eye on the ball, not ball in your eye." [I wouldn't get hit in the eye with a tennis ball for another few years.] Sampow taught me the fundamentals but my mother spent countless hours on the courts hitting with me so that I could play pretty well.
When we moved back to the US, my mother got me involved in local tournaments and, from there, I progressed to MALTA - Mid Atlantic Tennis Association (part of the US Tennis Assoc.). I played in tournament after tournament and my parents shelled out tons of cash for lessons and traveling. At 15, I became a certified professional tennis instructor. I was sponsored by Wilson. I won grants to play in more tennis tournaments and participate in camps. I was recruited by colleges as an NCAA blue chip athlete. I would hit with my mother and we'd get into huge arguments because I was basically a terror when it came to tennis. I would yell at myself and my mother would get upset with me and then I'd yell at my mother. I was never happy with the way I played and I would get very nervous about playing because I didn't want to fail. In other words, I somehow got the strange idea that failing on the tennis court meant that I was a failure as a person. I was way too personally intertwined with this game and there was really no escape for many years. I've glossed over the highs and lows but, basically, tennis and I have had a long history.
I stopped loving tennis about 25 years ago but I kept playing because I didn't know how not to play. I didn't play for about 5 years after I graduated from West Point and then I took it up again and played intermittently. About 7 years ago, I decided that I just didn't want to play anymore. At all. I was over it. Its still weird when someone doesn't know about my tennis background but I haven't really played tennis now for a long time. So...it was sort of monumental that I picked up my racquet bag and trudged out to the courts this past weekend. I just felt like playing again and I felt strong enough to know that how I played was no reflection on me. [I played pretty well for an old broad who hadn't picked up a racquet in 7 years though...if I say so myself.] I had to spend some time away from my first boyfriend and first love (tennis) and learn how to be by myself before I could go back and have a healthy relationship with tennis again. We're taking it slow and getting to know each other again. I'll let you know how it turns out (but I'm feeling pretty hopeful).
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