peas with honey

Looking for someone to save me.

I think I've spent most of my life expecting that someone or something is going to come along and make everything alright.  I recently realized that this is NEVER going to happen.  I'm not going to win the lottery.  That wouldn't fix everything either.  I'm going to have to make it all happen myself.  I've sort of been biding my time and doing various interesting things but (quite honestly) have always believed in the back of my mind that someone would show me how I was supposed to be happy and help me work it all out.  There IS someone who can do that....me.  I'm the person who can help myself through anything and I'm the person who will always be there for me.  I know all the stuff I've done and I know how to make things right.  I know what I am capable of in my heart and I won't be satisfied until I've accomplished those tasks.  That's not a bitter observation...it's a "learning how to take care of myself" observation.  That's probably why a lot of my relationships haven't worked out.  Because that person could never make things right...of course he couldn't...only I could do that.  You cannot accept love to any greater degree than you have to give.

This is something I'm working on.

Toll Roads in Arizona.

Coming into work this morning I heard a radio report that said that the legislature has passed a bill last night making all of the local freeways toll roads and the shocking thing was that this was going to start tomorrow!  They had the helicopter traffic news guy talking about the extra hours it would take to get to work tomorrow and he explained that they were going to place ADOT (AZ Dept. of Trans.) guys at all of the ramps to collect tolls.  The report included interviews with several people where comments were made about how it was good or bad because of our state budget problems and I flipped out.  I called my mother and complained about how crazy this state is and how it is SO like the legislature here to pull some midnight legislation like that.  I bitched to my mother the entire drive to work and walking to my building as well as right until I got into my office .... then I looked at my calendar and realized that it was April 1st.  Yes...I totally got fooled....they did a good job too.  Damn.  Now I must seek revenge....